Holiday Newsletter

Happy Holidays to everyone. It is difficult to summarize the past 12 months in only a few paragraphs. So much has happened and 2016 is already knocking on the door. Lots to share. In this letter, instead of complaining about work, I am here to celebrate it.

I am counting my blessings this holiday season in lieu of bitterness. One of the wonderful perks to my employment is my bi-weekly drive to the Baltimore office. My car comes home clean every time I head up north because the chance of rain is 100% when I am at the wheel. As if God himself wrangled all the water from habitable planets in the universe and decided to unleash them in a 12-hour period. 

It looks like it's clearing up.

The precipitation has a nice affect on the 70 mile commute. Instead of dealing with the pesky accelerator I was able to view brake lights, fire trucks, police sirens, and the occasional car fire on the shoulder of the road. With the heavy traffic, I could enjoy these vistas for twice as long as necessary: 3 hours, one way, to be exact. On one occasion, the thoroughness at which my window was smashed was impressive. More so since it happened during business hours in the company parking lot. Driving home with the wind and rain actually in my car gave me an appreciation for storm chasers. What I am trying to say is....thank you, Baltimore.

It looks like it's picking up, I'm going to head home now.

It is difficult to refrain from bragging in these letters. A big part of me wants to toot my own horn. A small part tells me to be humble. Well, here goes--when I am not in Baltimore, I work from home. As a matter of fact, I work from home a lot. Some would say, "too much." Others would say, "Is he still around?" Video conferencing makes me feel more connected to my co-workers. Once they see me onscreen, they make me realize I should be more connected with my razor. 

Can we speed it up on the agenda, please.

Days in isolation and I begin morphing into Will Forte's stunt double for, "The Last Man on Earth." Except a stunt double would actually be in shape. Working from home also involves eating, lots of it. I check the refrigerator approximately every five minutes to see if the contents have changed. My weaknesses are pickles, olives, cottage cheese, mozzarella cheese, muenster cheese, cheddar cheese, cheesy cheese. Okay, so I like cheese. They all say, "How does he stay so thin?" Here is my secret: at the end of the day, I go on a 20 foot walk to the mailbox. It helps burn off the cheese. I also have voices in my head that say, "How does he stay so thin?" Enough of the bragging.

Hmm, I wonder if there is any cheese left?

December is a time of reflection. We will not remember anything past the first five words of "Auld Lang Syne" but we will remember those who touched our lives this past year. Yes, a company has to make profit. But that profitability is directly tied to the work of the employees. The people who show up every day to give the best version of themselves. Those are the people I will remember. And if you took all of my co-workers from this past year and laid them end to end in a straight line, you are a fucking weirdo. You don't do that people.